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Pacing slowly back and forth, avoiding the glances of the jury in front of me, I think back to the night that started it all. Dark and rainy, like some sort of cheesy crime show, Reynolds called me from a payphone confirming my nightmare- she had done it. In all my years as someone who hunted the one spineless bastard who always seemed to get away at the last minute I had finally figured why.

It all started 15 years ago when I was put on my first case- I was a part of a team of elite trackers who hunted art thieves that worked in the world's largest cities calling themselves the Underground- my preference being Paris. The case was the biggest ever seen- the case?
2 dead guards
Blacked out camera footage
1 enormous oil painting highlighting ancient foods of the Mediterranean gone
And 1 smart son-of-a-bitch

Of course, at the time, everyone (including me) thought it was a team of thieves but further evidence proved otherwise. How could the biggest painting in the gallery by the most famous artist in France go missing? I had solved it after 15 years of hunting- Laura. The love of my life at one point in time who was always one step ahead in the chase- how did I not see? She didn't ask about the case, I didn't meet her until after that night, and she didn’t seem like the type of thief that would work the Underground.

As the years went on I stayed on the hunt with my team- heist after heist, the shadow we chased was one step ahead- always. Reynolds, the detective of my bunch of misfits, stumbled on a lead and latched on like a bloodhound with a bag of AB neg. A lucky hunch led to a fingerprint that later led to a name for our elusive foe- Laura Reynolds.

From her first professional heist all those years ago, Laura had stolen dozens of works totaling $15 million including an oil painting showcasing ancient Mediterranean olives and prunes. All those heists led to this moment, the tense moment in the justice system right before the jury reads "guilty" and sends my first love away for 50 years- the moment of bittersweet tragedy.


  • I feel like there's a whole movie/novel in this hors d'oeuvres!

    What were your ingredients?
    first girlfriend...?
    Oh, wait, this was the one we did together, rt?
  • Here they are:

    Main Ingredients:
    first girlfriend

    Spice Pack:
    1/8 pinch of disgust
    1/2 smidge of satisfaction
  • Here is my video explaining what led me to the detective story:

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