Very concise and clear sentences which allowed the audience to really imagine even with the smallest details.
I like how you really brought life to this bored working woman. The ending felt a little rushed, but I felt like it worked because the prot…
The imagery and your voice excellently made the story of this old sailor come to life! It was absolutely captivating, and I agree with the comment above me that it felt like a black and white movie of an old sailor remembering the 'Great Food Fight …