I'm glad it wasn't number 45. Although I guess he technically crossed the finish line, too... Anyway, I love this post! The writing is so strong, so much like an excerpt from a novel or something. Right from the start – with the "Pay attention, Matt…
LMFAO!!! Hilarious – I love how you (or your character) has such a strong voice. It really feels like this blunt chef who gives no fucks whatsoever is talking to me because of the conversational tone. The lack of capitalization adds to how casual it…