former boss
zoologist
caribou
chia seeds
laboratory
Spice Pack:
1/4 dollop of surprise
1 dash of humiliation
I’m obsessed with a caribou. I’ve visited him every single day this week. I think he likes me too.
The zoologist that watches him is obsessed with me. I think. He stares at me a lot and keeps trying to talk to me. He has so many questions. Like why have I come so many times every week? Can he help me? Am I okay? But I’m only interested in the caribou. He can go back to his laboratory and play with his microscope for all I care.
On the 53rd day of visiting the caribou, I happen to run into my former boss, Tanya. Didn’t really leave on great terms so kind of trying to avoid her. I try to hide behind the caribou, but Tanya sees me. She’s always eating chia seeds and they’re always like all in her teeth and it’s all just an unattractive situation. Cringe. She’s coming over.
Tanya prattles on for a little bit but she’s actually alright. She actually offered me my job back. Considering the events that led to my dismissal, that’s a surprising offer. Maybe Tanya’s not as bad as I remembered. She was actually pretty pleasant today.
I head back to the caribou. The zoologist is waiting for me. I’m feeling pretty bold so I decide to confront that creep once and for all.
Unfortunately, after yelling at him for stalking me, I was ashamed to learn that he thought I was the crazy one for staking out the caribou pen every single day. And he doesn’t have a crush on me. Awkward.